DECEMBER 21,2012

AEROFLOT SUPER TOURNEY SHOCKS CHESS WORLD ..GOES ALL FIDE WORLD RATED RAPID AND BLITZ CHESS..DITCHES  ALL SLOW TIME CONTROLS   MOSCOW, RUSSIA. DECEMBER 21,2012……… As predicted by  CHESSLAB CHESSFLASH NEWS mighty all knowing seer  YOURS TRULY JUDE ACERS-THE MODEST  …..the  worlds great chess tourneys will  soon no longer tolerate fraud..leaving the chess board for any reason following a French world  chess team debacle where several thousand dollars and a bronze medal were stolen from a  Fide team tourney by tweeted- in computer analysis done thousands of miles away in Paris (it would never have been found out if the fabulous french team officials had not turned in the cheaters  WEEKS AFTER THE TOURNEY ENDED and  backed it up with phone evidence(the crooks were too cheap to buy their own cell phones,  stupidly borrowed team phones to steal from the worlds greatest team event)…the worlds greatest  grandmaster plus open  AEROFLOT (MOSCOW) HAS ANNOUNCED ALL CHESS WILL BE 25 MINUTE RAPID AND BLITZ ONLY…the time when any player will ever be allowed to leave the board during world class chess play WILL SOON BE NEVER -EVER……… even the world chess championship is soon going to be played this way..sorry purists (ever heard of TOPALOV?)……………The only alternative is THE BICK  guillotine penalty…. “” NEW ORLEANS RULES “-JOHN BICK  LAW….the   six time (!!) Louisiana chess champion told me flatly that he plans a  possible million dollar plus tourney sometime in his lifetime of stock portfolio management ……” for one million dollars I will have every player  in the entire tourney sign a letter that guarantees that if  I even think they are cheating they are a gone pecan..on the next plane out WITH NO APPEAL”…by the way ..let me mention that a good name for Mr. Bick’s  projected tourney would be “THE ONE MILLION DOLLAR   JUDE FRAZIER ACERS MEMORIAL  CHESS TOURNEY!” of course.  Surely Chesslab readers, anything less would be positively uncivilized!……………… a critical factor is now online stream video from EVERY laptop and cell phone camera…people -SPONSORS who want advertising / ratings are going to demand that both hugely paid  contestants (one million dollars per player is now the  norm for world champion ANAND) ARE IN THEIR CHAIRS AT ALL TIMES..25 MINUTES PER GAME (per player) TOPS AND WITH ONE GAME WITH WHITE AND BLACK PLAYED EVERY DAY BY BOTH CONTESTANTS. … two international grandmasters who state flatly that the players are certain to cheat if permitted room are BEN GOLDFINE -LARRY KAUFMAN, the worlds leading computer practical play expert who won the the world senior international co championship twice. OTHER RULES CHANGES ARE RAPIDLY COMING..NO DRAW OFFER ALLOWED EVER..PLAY TO CHECKMATE,  STALEMATE, KING VERSUS KING  draw..no other material left on the board…DRAW BY PERPETUAL OR REFEREE STOPS THE GAME AND DECLARES A DRAW VIA “NO LOSING CHANCES” FOR EITHER SIDE…THREE POINTS FOR A WIN, 1 POINT  ONLY FOR A DRAW…..ONE GAME WITH WHITE AND ONE WITH BLACK EVERY ROUND… the key element never mentioned   in dispatches is that people in New Orleans will now be able to play for the international chess grandmaster title daily with rapid and blitz games under world Fide judge supervision. THE WHOLE WORLD GETS TO PLAY IN EVERY CITY! ( NO MORE ‘GET PERMISSISON’ FROM THE SO CALLED US CHESS FEDERATION) The New Orleans Fide representative  will certainly  be  officially certified  Fide trainer Michael Ciamarra of  Birmingham , Alabama. ############i####